Darah and William's latest from Uganda

this one's for you.

Its been a lovely cruise. 

I'm sorry its ending ....

its sad but its true

Honey, its been a lovely cruise.

These moments we're left with, may you always remember.  They were shared by few.

The wind in our hair, and red dust in our shoes.

Honey its been a lovely cruise.

These moments were left with, may you always remember.

These moments were shared by few.  And those NYC lights are coming in to view. 

We bid our farewell much to soon.

So drink it up, this one's for you.

Honey, its been a lovely cruise.

Every now and then there are moments in my life where I fully accept the fact that there are higher powers controlling our existence.  For example, on Sunday there was a thunder and lightning storm around 3p.m. that was so strong that I can only compare it to the sound of bombs being dropped in the movies.  And of course, the power went out.  The power is still out, and it is Tuesday.

Tuesday.

I have spent the past three days on the phone with the electric company.  Every day there is a new story.  "Oh the power will be on by 7pm."

"Oh, we are doing some maintenance work."

"Oh the power will be on by 4pm Monday."

"The power is not back on?  Why is that?(I have no f-ing idea that's why Im calling you!) It should be back on by 7pm."

"Where is your house?  Ok, I will send a technician."

And so the story goes.  They say that they are sending an electrician out to our area for two days nows, to check our street, and has one showed?  No.  Plus we live on a rather main through-way for our neighborhood, but it does not seem to matter.  They are even surprised when I call back and say that no one has arrived to check out our house.  As if I gain something from lying to them about their electricians not doing their job.  So I think it is someone's idea of a cruel joke to play on us to remind us that life is completely un-predictable here, even when you know what is going to happen over the next two days. 

Unfortunately it is a rather bitter way to end our time here, especially after the amazing going-away party that we hosted on Saturday night.  We had about 20 to 25 people stop over, have a drink (or three), eat some of Darah's amazing cooking, and wish us the best on our way home.  The party started around 5p.m. and continued on until the wee-small hours of the morning.  Thanks go out to James, Laura, Toby, Ilona, Tom, Tom O, Damelly, Katie, Kip, Sarah, Joe, Tim, Imran, Natasha, Sam, Roberta, Angela, Luke, Catherine, Stu, and everyone else that was able to stop by and wish us well.  Each of you has made our time in Uganda enjoyable, exciting, and an easy transition to the ex-pat lifestyle.

1.  How Ugandans read the paper at work, and that is seen as "ok".  Literally, if you have nothing else to do you can just sit back and read the paper.  Or maybe I have a little too much New England-Puritanical Ethos in me.

2.  How men use the bathroom with the toilet seat down, no matter which activity they have to participate in.  It is just plain gross.

3.  How you have to pay for each round of drinks or food as they come, otherwise there is 75% chance the waitstaff will add on additional drinks to your tab.

4.  How the first words you hear from 7 out of 10 kids are "Muzungu, give me money."

5.  The muzungus that do stop to give these kids money.

6.  How newspaper writers use the "thesaurus" option in Word in order to make themselves sounds more sophisticated.  It is like watching the Friends episode where Joey writes the letter of recommendation for Chandler and Monica over and over and over again.

7.  How no one, black, white, indian, asian, uses car-seats for their kids.  The only car seat I have seen in Uganda so far belongs to our neighbors.  Everyone else lets their kids just run around inside the car.  I can almost, almost understand the Ugandan point of view, but from the ex-pats coming from Europe and the States?  No way.   

This past Saturday Darah, myself, and 76 of our closest friends went rafting on the White Nile.  The rafting section of the Nile is about an hour outside of Kampala, and world's away from any of the other rafting I have done before.  The rafting here was more a series of waterfalls followed by rapids.  Where in Maine and Switzerland it was more of a barrage of rapids with just one or two drops.   

The map above details the river and shows the 10 different rapids we did, starting with Easy Rider and finishing off with "The Bad Place".  The rapids ranged from Class 3 to Class 6, the highest in the world.  Thankfully we did not attempt any of the Class 6 rapids as rafting companies only allowed experienced world-pro kayakers to go down those.  Our guide, Josh, was a 20-something Canadian "dude" who had just wrapped up a tour in Australia.  He was your classic rafting guide/outdoorsman/extreme dude with blond hair and stories about the dumb things people have done on a raft.

The morning was relatively un-eventful for the raft.  We made it through the first few rounds of Class 3, 4, and 5 rapids without flipping or losing a crew member.  It was at Big Brotherthat , I think, 3 of us got bounced out of the raft and made our way downstream.  Josh said that if we had managed to stay on the raft the whole boat would have flipped over.  Instead it was just myself, some uber-chatty recent Harvard grad, and the lurking 6 foot 3 inch "vet student" who showed up with gear earily reminiscent of a member of the armed forces serving in a desert.

In between getting bounced out, stories about rather un-enlightened American teenage girls, and swimming in the river we had to paddle.  We had to paddle for roughly 2 hours after lunch to get to Overtime, Retrospect, and the Bad Place.  Upon arriving at the Bad Place we had to portage the raft due to the fact that they first 300 yards of the river are Class 6 and rather gnarly looking.  We put in, and off we went.  Josh was yelling the commands, forward, back, back on the left and front on the right, and next thing you know the current is ripping towards the final waterfall.

HOOOOLLLLYYY  SHHHHHH------.

Then WHACK!

The raft buckled at the bottom of the drop, and since I was sitting the second position, the front of the raft came back at me.  Unfortunately for me, the first position was filled by our friend James, a rather tall/strong former English military man.  As the raft buckled, he was thrown back headfirst.  Luckily my head was there to stop him, hence the WHACK.  I've been hit with lacrosse balls at 85 miles an hour in the head, a good left hook in the B&G Club boxing ring, and a couple trees skiing.  None of those experiences compared to this.  Head ringing, cartoon birds flying around, and slightly blurred vision in one eye.  Aaah, the tell-tale signs of a minor concussion. 

I was the lucky one.

Poor Laura, James's girlfriend, was in the same position on the opposite side of the raft.  She was the recipient of the 6 foot 3 American "vet students" helmet.   Broke her nose right at the top of the bridge.  But for someone with blood pouring out, she was a trooper.  She got right back in the raft and helped us paddle across the river to shore.  (X-rays later confirmed the break, but it was clean enough to not have to be set).

So even with a cranky jaw, busted bottom lip, sore left occiptal lobe, and a decent tan I write with rave reviews for the Adrift rafting experience.

I think this random pic off the internet is of Total Gunga, but I'm not sure.  These guys missed the good part though.  We went over the mini-waterfall you see in the top left part of the picture.  Once we get our still photos from the company I'll post.

Over the past few weeks I have received a couple comments that my writing style has been rather elementary over the past year (Yeah, I remember that class it was right between lunch and recess.)  So in order to appease my critics I am handing over the writing responsibilities to a published author today.  Here is an excerpt from a book I am reading. 

"I am not the first to observe that the landscape of rural ------ has been badly defaced these last thirty years by the slapdash construction of suburban housing in places where there are no suburbs.  On mountainsides, cliff tops and riversides, by secluded loughs, ancient bogs and neolithic monuments, the Invasion of the Killer Bungalows has swept all before it.  Strict planning regulations are now rumored to be in force, but the faux-Spanish haciendas, neo-Kelloggs dream homes, and mini-Southforks are already here.  At times it can seem that the booming ----- Tiger economy must be driven entirely by the manufacture of net curtains and plastic Doric columns.

    But before sneering at ------ bad taste, smug outsiders who live in twee English villages, like me, should bear in mind that the bungalow blight is simply the logical outcome of -----'s history of poverty; a poverty for which English landlords living across the sea in their carefully preserved villages must shoulder their fair share of the blame.  ------ simply does not possess the picturesque old housing stock that's to be found in England and France, because for many centuries, and until very recently, this was a desperately poor country.  Those houses were never built.  The census of 1842, for example, records that eighty-four percent of the population of the ---- at that time were living in one-room mud huts.  Visitors like Thackery, though used to the deprivation of Victorian London, were staggered by the poverty and squalor they witnessed.

    The self-confident synthetic consumerism of the new houses is a response to this history of deprivation.  'Look' the bungalows are saying, 'we're not peasants any more.  We buy things now, rather than digging them up.  We've been sitting on bare wooden benches for centuries, but we've got Dralon sofas now, just like you.'  So people whose parents made do with bare concrete floors are now mad for fitted carpets, preferably in epilepsy-inducing designs.  Grandchildren of turf-cutters who never saw an indoor toilet can't wait to install turf-effect gas fires and en-suite avocado bidets.  Often you'll see an inappropriate-looking new house built right next to the ruin it's replaced.  'We were that,' its saying, ' but now we're this.'  It's a very ----- paradox that modern houses and bungalows can speak so eloquently of the nation's past."

Who knew that a book about a guy tracing his Irish roots after a lifetime of living in England would so appropriately describe the same scenes we see in Kampala on a daily basis.  I wonder if any International or Community Development professors have ever read "McCarthy's Bar".  Maybe they should.  Or, it would behoove their intellectual and personal understanding of the socio-economic forces that are present in the every day life of people living in a developing country. 

African Headlines:

- Yesterday I heard the music group, Obsessions, interviewed on the radio.  They are an all female band, of four, which makes them completely different from Destiny's Child when they sing their pop/love songs.  When the radio dj asked them "What makes you the Obsessions?"

Their response "Well, you know, we're obsessed with stuff."

A second comment, "Yeah, like, we are obsessed with our band and you should be too."

"Its really hard to explain in words" said another.

My response.  Wow.  Pop stars are the same all over the planet

- Did you know that South Africans, mainly the muzungus, use lions to protect their farms?  How does that work exactly?   How do you use a LION to protect your property?

Apparently it didn't and one person was killed by a pack of them

 http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/africa/6272600.stm

Kenyan Deputy Ministers say they are "bored" at work.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/africa/6260930.stm

Under the topic of "Took them long enough"

Nigerians have shifted their guerilla tactics from trying to kidnap white oil workers, because they travel in military convoys now, to kidnapping wives and children.   So far no one has been killed because the ransoms have been paid, and the hostages released.  So who is the slower of the two parties?  The Nigerians for not recognizing that this same tactic has been taking place in central and south america for years?  Or the white, first world educated, oil workers, who didn't see this coming, despite the fact that they been under for over a year?  Wouldn't your family be the first people you think about once ANY abduction started happening?

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/africa/6274416.stm

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/africa/6275890.stm

And under "Big Shocker"

 http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/africa/6268468.stm

Now, you may notice that there are only four people in the picture.  Laura, James, Lucy and Chris.  And you are left to think, where is Darah or Wil?  Well, let me answer that for you.  Darah took the picture.  I was huddled up in the seat, passed out from a headache that could only be described as "Migraine jr".  I woke up at 5:00 am with a screaming pain in my head, and when I went out to go to the bathroom I winced from the light of the moon.  I popped a few pills, and eventually it went away, at like 3 that afternoon.  Driving around a game park in a 8 passenger 4x4 van is not exactly the ideal place to be with Migraine Jr. 

This is the view of the Falls from the top of the boat.  We took a 3 hour boat ride to see birds, birds, birds, birds, birds, hippos, gilligan and the skipper too. 

There were elephants as well.  I think they were having Sunday afternoon brunch. 

The view from atop Murchison Falls.   

The view from the bottom of the falls. 

A quick elephant story.

Turns out that there was a big party on Saturday night at Murchison Falls.  So big that we actually heard it while trying to fall asleep in our tent.  When we arrived at the park to pick up our guide we were told that there were no guides available due to the fact that they were too hungover.  The best part?  All of the park guides were sitting together, in uniform, underneath a tree at the entrance. 

We were told to proceed with caution, and sent on our way.

Five minutes in the drive we encounter a family of elephants.  Our driver says "Take your pictures quick, I do not have a gun to scare off the elephants."  So everyone stands up and starts snapping away.  We inch a little closer.  Then a baby elephant walks across the road.  The mother elephant turns, flaps her ears, and there is a simultaneous gasp throughout the van.  The driver drops it into reverse, only to find one of the HUGE overlander vehicles parked directly behind us.  Now, our little van could zip away if it weren't for the fact that a tractor trailer was parked behind us.  Everyone gave another "oh sh-t" to one another, but thankfully the elephants decided we were not a threat and moved on their way. 

You can't make this stuff up. 

No, that's not the soccer formation the US Men's National Soccer team used to lose two games in two tries.  That was the vote of the Continental Congress to declare their independence from Great Britain.  And even though the vote was cast on July 4th, the signing of the Declaration of Independence was not completed until August. 

I try to keep my mouth shut about politics on the blog.  But today, it's America day baby.  My fundamental right according to a little thing called, the Bill of Rights.

A couple other random America thoughts:

- NEVER feel bad for any American that lives abroad and works for any US government agency, embassy, or contractor.  NEVER. The life that they lead in Uganda, and probably all over Africa is a pretty nice one.  Where else can you have a sweet house, a car, probably a driver, a cook, a cleaner, and a maintenance man all on Uncle Sam's dime? All while your American salary collects interest in your bank account bank home, because you have no living expenses in country. What other places "force" you to take 2 week home leaves every 4 or 6 months?  Sure their jobs are not always easy, but it ain't always hard.  I think it goes back to the precedent Ben Franklin set while living Paris back in the day.  Go figure.

-  How about this line in the Declaration of the Causes and Necessities to Take up Arms:

"But a reverance for our Creator, principles of humanity, and the dictates of common sense, must convince all those who reflect upon the subject, that government was instituted to promote the welfare of mankind, and ought to be administered for the attainment of that end."

Man, when was the last time we had a politician write that eloquently, and not get assasinated? 

- Toby Keith is a registered Democrat.  Well at least according to his latest PBS interview with Tavis Smiley.

- Bill O'Reilly is supposedly third party.

- 35 of the 55 members of the first Continental Congress were lawyers.  Not much has changed since.

- How are Somalia and the US alike?  Neither country has ratified the International Convention on the Rights of the Child. Once again, for emphasis, the government of the United States of America has not adopted the United Nations Convention on the Rights of the Child. It includes little things like the right to grow up with a family, receive free education, highest level of health care, freedom from child labor, etc.  You know, minor stuff.  Who knew that we would have something to talk about over dinner with the Somali government?  

- "Seven years of college down the drain.  Might as well join the f-king peace corps!" - Bluto

*This post was supposed to run on the 4th of July, but there may be technical issues.  I apologize to all Americans if they feel that I have slighted our national holiday.*

Due to crappy internet, only pics today

There were more giraffes in the Park than any other animal.

An elephant.  One of many. A good story about elephants coming tomorrow.

I can't remember what this guy was called, so we will call him long-faced kob.  Very technical term.

The Kob, the national animal of Uganda 

The ole water buffalo.  Big, black, and apparently blind. 

but I'm not talking about the MC known as Shawn Carter, aka Jay-Z, aka J-hovah, aka Jigga-man, this time.

Nope, I'm talking about the good ole-fashion jigger flea that likes to latch onto the bottom of your foot and begin infesting the flesh.  What started off feeling like athlete's foot turned into the world's ugliest blackhead, and then a differential diagnosis was completed by Darah, Justin (compound guy), and Antonia (neighbor's baby-sitter).  They promptly started my surgery at noon today, and they had removed the worm, the larvae, and the dead skin around it in under an hour. 

Traditionally these kinds of fleas/larva are found in places where there is stagnate pools of human fecal matter.  Which we don't have near us and I really do my best to stay away from when bare-footed.  Or they can be found on dogs and cats, of which they are both in the compound now.  Now there is a decent sized-hole in the bottom of my left foot and I have to tell the soccer coach I can't play today because of a hookworm.  Darn it.